Frank Solich Doesn’t Know What Will Muschamp’s Problem Is

FootballAthens, Ohio – Frank Solich is sitting at his desk in the new Ohio University Football complex, shaking his head in moderate disbelief.

“I don’t get it, I really just don’t get it,” he says, sighing. “At first, I figured it was just a misspeak. Surely Brady meant ‘Ohio State’. Why would he call out ‘Ohio’? We never did anything to him.”

“Then he did it again. It didn’t seem as cute this time. I thought maybe his Michigan keester was still smartin’ from Groce’s boys knocking Beilein’s Wolverines out of the tournament in ’12. You know, we coaches have each other’s backs. I’d stick up for my basketball coach like anyone would.”solich

“Now, I’m just getting mad. He won’t stop. I don’t know what his deal is. We don’t even play them! I don’t even know if we ever have.” Solich seems like he’s at his wits end.

He said he’s reached out to Hoke, to correct him. He’s called him on the phone numerous occasions, to let him know he’s getting a little tired of the joke. He’s not going to let Hoke goad him into a shouting match. “I could call the Wolverines ‘The Broncos’ or ‘The Chippewas’ or even ‘The Spartans’. But I’m not stooping to his level.”

He wonders if greasy fingers cause problems with capacitive touch screens. There has to be a reason why Hoke won’t answer.

“And now Will Muschamp is getting into the game. What the heck is going on?” Solich is exasperated. He just read Muschamp’s comments out of today’s SEC Media Day meetings, where Muschamp was quoted as saying, “We appreciate our friends from Ohio making sure we follow NCAA rules. They certainly know something about NCAA rules.” Mushcamp followed up by saying, “It’s a dead issue. In both situations we were turned in by Ohio.”

Solich is getting nervous. “WHAT SITUATIONS?!”

“What does he mean by, ‘we know something about NCAA rules’? Of course we do!”

Solich wonders if Muschamp is still stinging from that near upset of his Gators by the upstart Bowling Green Golden Falcons (from the Mid-American Conference, the same conference Solich’s Ohio Bobcats partcipate in). “Maybe Bowling Green put the fear in Muschamp. MACtion is coming for you, Willie Boy! You don’t have Mack or Nick’s coattail to ride on anymore!”

At this point, Solich’s face is starting to turn red. It’s clear now that this means war. “Hoke didn’t scare me when he started this crap and now Muschamp can just get in line.”

“He can come say that right to my face. Then we’ll see. We’ll see what Ohio is all about.”

(Chris Farley was unavaialble for comment)


  1. […] of quick thoughts- First- What did Coach Solich ever do to you? Second- Didn’t Florida report Ohio State for the improper “bump” of Noah Spence? […]

  2. […] of quick thoughts- First- What did Coach Solich ever do to you? Second- Didn’t Florida report Ohio State for the improper “bump” of Noah Spence? […]

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: