Weekend Open Thread: “Dinner with the Buckeyes”

So a few weeks back I was listening to the “Poscast” (Joe Posnanski’s Podcast) that we was doing with Ken Tremendous (AKA Michael Schur AKA Mose Shrute AKA my favorite sports blogger ever) and they were doing one of their “fantasy drafts.” This one was “if you could to dinner any five sports figures, who would they be?”

So for our first summer Open Thread, I thought I’d modify that question a little and find out what you guys thought. Since we can’t have a proper “draft”, we’ll leave it open to everyone. If you could have dinner with any five Buckeyes, who would they be? They could be historical Buckeyes, non-athletes, current Buckeyes. Whoever.

Here’s my five. I put a limitation on my list to be Buckeyes I had seen in action with my own two eyes. Live and (for all but one) in person.

1. Vernon Gholston – This one is obvious. I have no idea what we would talk about and it would probably get uncomfortable after a few minutes of me staring, but I would like to meet the man behind the body. Plus, we could reminiscence about his dismantling of Jake Long and his one-armed tackle of Albert Young. And then there was the Northwestern game where he had that beautiful TD. I think we’d eventually hit it off.

2. Alonzo Spellman – This might be a weird pick here, but it makes sense if you understand my fascination with both: physical specimens and Ohio State Defensive Ends. Had MotSaG existed 20 years earlier we would have had Alonzo Spellman Shots of the Week. Before there was Gholston, there was Spellman. He was the original manimal. I’d wager that Mr. Spellman might make dinner conversations interesting.

3. Rob Kelly – My favorite defender on the should-have-been-National-Champs 1998 team. I don’t know if it was the giant cross tattoo on his arm or the white socks pulled high or what, but I loved the way Kelly played and I always imagined my 23 year-old-self would be really good friends with Kelley.

4. Chris Spielman – Here are the obvious ones. No one is more of a Buckeye than Spiels and I would just love to sit back and hear his stories. If I could have two dads, I would want Spielman to be my other one. I think my real dad would be okay with that.

5. Eddie George – And finally, yes, I would love to sit down with Eddie and hear his journey, as well. Possibly the greatest running back I’ve ever watched, I think I’d enjoy hearing him recount his record setting games and everything else that happened during his times at Ohio State. Do you think he ever got car deals?

So those are my five. Within my constraints, I could have added another dozen players, including basketball players. If I expanded it to all-time Buckeyes, I’d be paralyzed trying to whittle the list down to 25, not to mention 5. But I’m happy with my list.

Who are you inviting to dinner?


  1. Would it be a cop-out to invite Boom, Posey, Adams, Pryor, and Solomon Thomas to dinner right before their freshman years at OSU.

    Conversation topic- “Ummm… I’m from the future, and if you sell any of the great awards you’re going to get, or accept any money for autographs, it’s not going to end well for anyone.

    Oh, and TP? Get a bike.”

  2. 1. Jesse Owens-Anyone that stood up to Hitler…I’d love to tald to.

    2. Jim Tressel-Great leader, great person. Could learn a lot.

    3. Troy Smith-One of my favorite Buckeyes ever.

    4. Spiels-Just to talk football. Dude knows his stuff.

    5. Orlando Pace-Just to see how much he’d eat.

  3. @Mali – That’s totally not a cop-out, that is a great idea. You could tell TP: “You can own this city. Just keep your nose clean and the Keys to the City are yours.” I’m not sure he can ever show his face around these parts.

    @Kade – If I went historical, Jesse Owens was definitely first on my list. Along with Woody and Jack Nicklaus.

  4. 1. Chris “Beanie” Wells – The best running back I have ever seen. That was with injuries.

    2. Troy Smith – Phenomenal leader, started from the ground up and achieved greatness.

    3. Ted Ginn Jr. – All these guys were so awesome.

    4. Spielman – “…”

    5. Jaamal Berry – You here at MotSaG have a man crush on Gholston. Mines Jaamal Berry.

  5. 1) Corny Greene. Had the “misfortune” of being the QB at the same time that Griffin was in the backfield; otherwise would be given a lot more recognition. 31-3-1 as a starter, never lost to UM, beat USC in the Rose, beat out Griffin for league MVP (even though Griffin had won two Heismans), and did it all while looking over his shoulder due to a death edict from the KKK (for having the audacity to be OSU’s 1st starting black QB).

    2) Katzenmoyer. OSU has always had hard hitters, but the era of the Silver Bullets was started by Katz. Somewhere, Corby Jones is drooling and still having bladder control problems.

    3) Keith Byars, ya’ll? The “original” Beanie Wells. Looking back, seeing his famous shoeless TD run (take THAT, Denard) was one of the first times I remember screaming with fanatatical exuberance at the television. Definitely one of the defining moments that created this Buckeye fan.

    4) Joe Germaine. The Iceman. OSU’s last pure pocket passer – he never played rattled and his spirals were so tight the ball looked like CGI. Had he not had the terrible luck of ending up behind Kurt Warner in the NFL, Germaine would have been to OSU what Tom Brady is to UM.

    5) Was going to say Orlando Pace, but @Kade took that. So I’ll say Shane Falco. “Pain heals. Chicks dig scars. Glory lasts forever.”

    UPDATE: How could I forget Mike Doss? *Hangs head in shame.* Gave up a sure NFL career after his junior year for purely unselfish reasons: to lead his team to a national title – and did precisely that. Still one of the most electrifying defensive players I’ve ever seen.

  6. After thinking some more, I have an alternate 5:

    1) James Laurinaitis
    2) AJ Hawk
    3) Bobby Carpenter
    4) Vernon Gholston
    5) Kirk Herbstreit

    “Hey, Guys, what’s up? Thanks for inviting me to dinner… Hm? Uh, Guys? Yeah, hi… …is everything OK? You’re all looking at me really weird. …OK, seems like you’re upset at something, but we’re all Buckeyes here. AJ, why are you shutting that door? Now, slow down everyone. C’mon. You know I’m a fan, I just can’t act like one on TV. …Guys? Vernon, there’s no need to take your jewelry off. Heh. Hey James, long time no-OUCH. My bad, my bad. Shouldn’t have patted you on the shoulder. Probably surprised you. Heh… ow. No problem. Don’t worry, a little ice & that’ll be good as new. Aw, C’mon, guys!! Seriously! What’s in the box, Bobby? Seriously! oh… oh… oh my. OK guys, I get it. Raincoats. Haahahahaha! OK, you sure scared me. Heh. Great joke. I get it. OK, please. Seriously. OOFOWOWOWOOW. OK fellas, I can’t breathe. What do you want from me? Get off!! Leggo my arms and legs! No duct tape NO DUCT TAPE NO DUCT TAPE. Not on my skin!!!!!! You know what that stuff does to tanned skin?!? OK, fine!! Tape me to this tackling dummy?!? Think that’s funny!? Lining up 15 yards away?!? You need 15 yards, do you?!? Now I’ve had it!! You have no idea who you’re dealing with now! Now I’m getting angry!! You want the wrath of Bronzholio? I’ll bring ALL of ESPN he–“

  7. West Coast Buckeye says

    My 5

    1. Troy Smith
    My favorite Buckeye Ever. He KILLED Michigan when he was here and developed into a great leader. One bad game against Florida prevented him from being Troy Smith National Champ.
    2. Mike Doss
    Scratch that, Mike FREAKING Doss.
    As in Did you see that Hit? That’s just Mike Freaking Doss man. he does what he does.
    3. Anthony Gonzalez
    Thank you for that catch. You’re going to feel it until you’re 40, but I’ll remember it till I die.
    4.Eddie George
    My childhood Buckeye Hero, Thank you for every game you played. sorry we waited till you were gone to Hire Tressel.
    5. Jim Tressel
    How firm thy Friendship, sir.

  8. Jay Roubini says

    1. Woody Hayes-lets talk Civil War, SEC~how do we give ’em hell Woody?
    2. Rex Kern-lost art of the fake, thx you created a lifelong fan.
    3. Dane Sanzenbacher-bills on me kid, thx for saving Buckeye Nation!
    4. Mike Doss-you were indeed unbelievable sir!
    5. Art Schlichter & Bobby Knight at the same table, see what happens!

  9. @Ian – Beanie would definitely be a fun one to have. I’d ask for a Stiff Arm of Justice, just for the experience.

    And we have a man-crush on Berry, too. It might not be Gholston-level man-crush (nothing will be) but we are excited about him as ever.

    @monkey – leaving Doss of my list was the hardest one to do. I loved his play ever since he was a freshman and his speech about coming back for his senior year still gives me the chills.

    Also, you win MotSaG forever coining the name Bronzholio.

    @WCB – Gonzo, the Michigan Killer. Man that was a catch!

    @Jay – I bet Knight throws a chair at Schlichter. What do you say?

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